Sometimes when get into a heated argument with other people, they may say things that’ll cross the line. They’d say something offensive, or they’ll criticize you for your actions and deeds, just so they can carry their point across. And for the most part these kinds of nasty comments kinda DO get to us – even if we don’t want them to.
We take these comments personally, as if they’re a true reflection of our character. Sometimes they are, but here’s the truth: most of the time they really aren’t. Here are 7 steps to ensure that you will finally stop taking things personally:
1. Realize that the rudeness of other people is not because of you.
It’s just a reflection of their inability to respond to situations kindly.
2. Ask yourself what else the person’s words or behavior might mean.
Does it hint of a much greater problem underneath? Does it tell you that they’re lying and trying to hide something?
3. Take criticism in a constructive way…
…even if they’re mean and derogatory. Ask yourself if there’s any truth to such criticism, and determine what important lessons you can learn.
4. Take a different perspective.
Imagine how a third party, unbiased outsider would assess the situation. Are you in the right, or in the wrong?
5. Realize that you can never please everyone at the same time.
Labor to please some people some of the time, but not all people all of the time. That will only lead to disappointment and sadness.
6. You are more than just the sum of your mistakes…
…or the sum of everyone’s criticisms of you. You are also made up of achievements, goals, plans, skills, talents, and dreams!
7. Realize that your self-worth ultimately depends on you.
You are the evaluator of your value. What others say don’t matter, unless you let them affect your judgment.